jaira’s Blog

Every word, every touch every look is a little too much
I’m helpless now to the arms of this stranger.
Haunting smiles, one by one creep inside and it’s over and done
Lost control, but without feeling danger

CHORUS
Does he know how it feels, to be dying inside when he goes
How it feels to be wondering if anything shows how it feels
Oh my everyday stranger.

Playing games in my mind say that I don’t want one of his kind.
I’ll wrap him up in a blanket of goodbyes
Then a turn for the worst, he looks up and I’m already cursed.
Tangled up and it’s harder to disguise.

There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to keep from dreaming of you
Unless you wanted me to.
But that’s something I may never know
There’s nothing I wouldn’t say to make it easier to walk away
Unless you ask me to stay
But the only way I’ll survive is if I go.

ang tao…

maraming takot mamatay…

maraming takot masaktan…

ang iba takot makasakit ng iba…

yung iba takot magmahal ng totoo…

ang ilan takot mawalan ng minamahal…

ang ilan pa nga gagawin lahat wag lang  iwanan…

may mga tao ding ayaw pang bitawan ang nakaraan…

akala kasi nila ayon ang magpapasaya sa kanila… akala nila ayon lang ang magpapasaya sa kanila at wala nang iba… yun pala nagiging dahilan na lang yun kasi takot siyang magmahal kasi takot siyang masaktan…

katulad nga ng laging sinasabi ni gamaliel, nakakamatay ang akala…

basta ako…

takot ako sa ipis.

tama ba?

mgiging tama ba?

okey lang bang umasang maging masaya… kahit panandalian lang?

FEB2′09-MONDAY.

nahuhulog na ang mga dahon na parang apoy na nakasabit sa sanga ng puno.

nakakatuwang panoorin.

masayang alalahanin na minsan naging masaya ka.

****

kahit nalulungkot ako… wala akong ibang mahiling para sa kanya kundi ang maging masaya. sana masaya na siya.

JAN30′09-FRIDAY.

minsan may nagagawa tayo na nakakahiya. malaking pagkakamali. hindi sinasadya. ang makulit pa dun…                hindi natin alam kung nahihiya lang ba tayo sa iisipin ng iba tungkol saten o masyado lang tayong nasasaktan.

****

ang paglayo sa bagay o taong nakakasakit sa atin…

madali lang….

madaling isipin.

MADALING GAWIN.

pero ang hirap maramdaman.

I know we’re headed for the open road.
Don’t know where to go.
We’ve got our separate ways in the same direction Getting nowhere slow.

We saw the end was coming, the credits rolling in
A few hundred miles back
Oh but our horizon tends to be deceiving
You never quite know where it’s at.

Baby can we just pretend we’re not telling lies and this ain’t ending.
No talk no time no goodbyes.
Nothing left of expectations just you and me and impulsive creations,
With an alibi.

If a moment is precious for it’s brevity
Then this one’s good as gold.
It’s a compromise of little white lies
The truth remains untold.

Do what you will but don’t go darlin’
No story ends before it’s started
Final words and we’ll be on our way
One last thing my dear departed
Save tomorrow for the broken heart
Don’t let it break today

haayyyy… dming ginawa.. mdami png ggwin…

kkatpos lng ng exams..

may techno p..

gumawa aq ng proj..

and my hand was calloused..

pgod n q..

may screwdriver n nanghihigop ng lakas..

puyat p q..

nakaka-adik mag-drill press..

antok n q..

uwi n q..

sna mtapos n..

Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do, I still feel you here ’till the moment I’m gone.

You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains.
I never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your rain.

Set me free, leave me be. I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I’m supposed to be.
But you’re on to me and all over me.

You loved me ’cause I’m fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone.

Set me free, leave me be. I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I’m supposed to be.
But you’re on to me and all over me.

I live here on my knees as I
Try to make you see that you’re
Everything I think I need here on the ground.
But you’re neither friend nor foe though I
Can’t seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you’re keeping me down
You’re keeping me down, yeah, yeah, yeah
You’re onto me, onto me and all over

Something always brings me back to you
It never takes too long…

haaayyy…. tomorrow, we’ll be singing yugto again with rico blanco… it reminds me of my beloved grey roxy jacket that was lost nung day na we performed sa myx mo!…  hehe… pero okey lang un… sana maging maayos… na-forget q n ung 2nd part n kakantahin dun e… panu b un…??  hehe.. buti n nga lng nasakin p ung pyesa non…   grabe sobrang excited n q… at kinakabahan… kc nmn.. 4pm ung call time pero 5pm p ung uwian… may values class p kc e… hayyy…

i’m hoping to have a great day tomorrow. To God Be The Glory!!!    lablab  

kakain nko…

pero mgttnong muna…

cno bng mkkpgsbi ng pgkakaiba ng knta paulit-ulit n 2mu2gtog s crang plaka n paulit-ulit ang 2gtog??

wlang point db?!

alam q wla… gutom n kc aq, kung anu-ano na’ng pumapsok s icp… pti xa.

sagot:

pra saken… ka2ld lng un ng pgiicp.

minsan, paulit-ulit nating pnakikinggan ung gus2 nating knta… mlamng dhil gus2 ntin 2… kya khit pti instrumentals kbisado n nten, cge p ren.

pero dhil mdami sa’tin ang may favoritism, mlamang may pborito dn taung part ng knta…at ung msalimuot n bhagi, nilalaktawan nlng.  pero dhil s gn2 ng gn2, khit hndi n uso ang plaka, naccra p dn nmn khit cd. ung tipong nkakabingi n ung paulit-ul8.

ayaw mn ntin blikn, utak n ang nagdidikta, hndi k2lad nung una taung mbighani s knta. gets?!

aq, hndi q naintindihn… gutom lng cguro yan.

cge kain n q.

tpos n ang mliligyang araw q… ang pgtambay… ang pgchill… ang 2munganga… ang gumawa ng wla hbang pnapatay ang mdudugong oras…. (tpos n kc ang u wk… i mean u days pla…).

ayoko n mn3p… bka kc hndi q n mkausap (ng matino). bka hndi n mging totoo ang minsa’y naging totoo -ang mga pngarap??…         bkit b gnun… prang cycle lng… ung tpong umulit-ul8…paulit-ulit…ul8…ul8…paulit-ul8..ul8…ulit…(n prang knta at hndi crang plaka…) ang labo… bkit kya… minsan klangn lng lumukin ag pride… ang pride n hndi nmn nkakabusog, hndi k2lad ng fried chicken at dumplings… prang ngumunguya ng msarap n pizza… msarap mn xa, di ba’t nkakapagod n s panga… ba’t di nlng mging kcng dali ng pgnamnam ng malamig n slurpee n cola flavor, frappe o di nmn kya ung milkshake n tlga nmng nkaka*chill….

at bgo q mkalimutn, happy bday nga pla! -bkit kya lgi nlng happy birtHday ang banat?? e pano kung hndi nmn xa msaya o kya wla xang balak magsaya… pero cguro un ay *assuming lng katulad ng ibng examples s math… sna msayang tlga… kya ttgiln q n… cguro nga msama aqng mgbiro… sbi nga sakin ng mga ate q hndi aq mrunong s joke kya hndi n q kumu-comment pgdating s gnon… at sbi, jokes are half-meant daw… eh ni hndi nga half e… dlawa lng un… totoo o hnde.

dti kinukulang aq ng lakas ng loob… pero e1 q b… hndi q alam kung dhil nagcmula s wla lng un o ano… msayang pnt3p… bata p q kya hndi nmn aq klangang pniwalaan minsan e… kc minsan may msasaktn… -aq b un?? -aq n yata. -pero mlay nten hndi nmn. -gnun b un tlga?? nkakainis nmn kc prang ang dling bitawan ng slita pero… -pero?? -pero hndi lhat mdali kya… -kya?? -wg nlng… -ano?? -wg n.

umuulan kya?? -oo, umuulan nga. cguro mrami nnmng mlungkot. mraming hndi mka-iyak kya langit ang umiiyak pra s knila. kya pla khit mbsa p ng ulan prng 2matkbo s kwlan… at nagiicp n wg nlng.

wlang kwenta… ggwa nlng aq ng project q… khit hndi q alam kung pra saan to… ggwin q kc dpat.